"Truly a Greek Inexperience"

A review of Eraina Cosmopolitan Taverna by Marcus Stevens - Monday 29th of September 2008

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A Truly Greek Inexperience

On our recent return from Lefkas a lovely Greek Island, we decided to take our 3 children out to enjoy and sample the Greek food that we were told this establishment provided, we even had tee shirts made to support the event, just a bit of fun, the girls were a bit tight but we enjoyed the banter on our way to this alleged Greek feast.

I had booked a table for 7.30pm and on our arrival we met with “mmmmmm sorry we have no table booked for you” in a very poor Indian Greek accent, we were shunted into a table for 4, I made a few remarks and the Indian waiter decided that yes, 6 into 4 does not go…… We were shown the cellar and I personally sat with my back to the stairs, every person going to the loo clipped my chair on their way down and the persons on their way back up from the loo, had to sidestep the other chairs parked along the route, it was like Kings Cross on a Friday, I am so glad other visitors didn’t have suitcases.

We were presented with a jug of water and glasses, however on smelling the inside of the glasses, it was apparent the washer had used a disgusting and week old, tea towel the smell was very off putting, probably used for washing the floor, I complained and was given a blank look by the waiter, however he did remove the glasses and replace with clean unsmelling ones, however he didn’t want to, he clattered into my chair again.

Eventually we managed to get our head round the menu, obviously written by an infant and someone of my personality would have found this difficult to understand, even with my PHD, we ordered drinks, diet coke, a bottle of wine Orange juices x2
We were all hungry but managed to order.

The wine was tasty and fresh like it said in the menu, the coke flat as the tarmac on the outside lane of the A14.

The starter arrived, soup of the day, packet soup mixed with dishwasher water no depth and certainly not Greek, the Greek salad oh dear processed Feta cheese with lettuce, I never have seen a Greek salad with Lettuce yes a truly Greek inexperience.

The Humous was brought in and not home made thank you Asda or Tesco for providing this, the stuffed vine leaves from a tin “ GREEK CUSINE AT ITS BEST”

Enter the main course I could see from the girls they would not welcome the end of the evening when the bill was to arrive, in previous meals when the service or food does not come up to what I believe is correct will receive my complaint.

I had ordered Lamb Kleftiko, what a mess on the plate just like the menu, the Lamb was fatty and bland, it was tasteless and must have been steamed or boiled, no hint of any flavour, the rice was undercooked and it had some red sauce of it which also was tasteless I didn’t even order chips but hey an oversight I was given a few to fit on the plate to make it full, the vegetables were tinned and it was so obvious that they had been micro waved and poorly drained as the vegetables were swimming on the plate, no sight of the mustard and cinnamon flavour of Levkas, yes a truly Greek experience……..i decided to push it to one side and go for the wine

My wife’s Aubergines, were stuffed with Lamb mince with more gristle than meat the rice was undercooked and it was a poor effort, my daughters spaghetti bolognaise was no more than a Tesco value ready made meal.

I complained to the Indian waiter who struggled with his dialect of English, however I was then introduced to a head waiter who was very apologetic and advised me that “lamb was fatty had I never had lamb before? “ anyway I was pleased when she offered me a change to my meal and I opted for the lamb kebabs, of which my other daughter had had, this took 10 or so minutes to arrive, I didn’t mind the wait I was still hungry, a poor effort to redeem themselves, the meat was undercooked and again the rice was crispy.

We decided to pass on desert and coffee paid the bill, although I feel the way the bill was presented was strange.

My advice, if your looking for a truly Greek experience go to Greece, this restaurant is just a “Truly Greek inexperience”

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